dilema.

i hate this.
am infatuated.
i like it.
but then i despise it.
i know this is getting worst.
i sleep soundly.
i sleep like a baby.
you are always in my dream.
that dream's like a lullaby.
then... i kept on day dreaming.
i know that i will not happen.
not in a million years from now.
not even in after life.
nor if we get to be reincarnated.
i know this is no carnal need.
i can feel that this is some "girlish feeling".
duuhhhh.