coming out.leaving.

dont touch me...
wait for me to ask you
wait for me to approach you
i am covered in thin glass
i can be shattered so easily
i am tired
my patience is so short
my understanding left me
i will smile only when i want
i will say whatever i want
i am tired
pleasing
being the good me
or maybe i have not been
maybe i have been trying hard but it was not seen
i want to be alone
i am tired... jaded... marked
i will be happy whenever i want to be
i wont be happy because you are
i will no longer share somebody else's happiness
i will no longer share somebody else's sorrow empathy nor sympathy will not exist within me anymore
i dont care about criticism nor will mind hushes behind my back

withdrawal from the world i so love? yes maybe... for so much love that i reach the part where i realize i am the only one loving, giving love and not leaving... i am not loved, not understood, left behind.. opening my mind.. seeing that i am alone in the world that i adore, i wallowed, pitied myself and realized that i need no one to survive...
just myself
yes!

forget those who pains me
and will pain me more
it's not worth anything

i am alone now... it is by choice.. driven by angst and selfish desire to be happy.
i admit i am wrong. but i will not reveal the reason behind this. like or not. just back off. i have removed one already and it may feel uneasy though the truimphant feeling is overwhelming that i was not able to notice the uneasy quesy feeling it caused... it's not that i had a feeling for this.. though still knowing that for a small amount of time makes me feel that that thing feels uneasy whenever am around.. ha! go on with your life and back off!!!

i look for that something big outside the world i came out.i can see him now.i will conquer.i new.