i hold. i free. i survive.

Sunday, October 31, 2004

place where i wanna be

sitting here alone in my room...fucked up and bored and depress at same time... reassesing whats missing in my life...a partner? maybe financial stability? more shoes to be added on my ever growing collection?nice job that i really like? or just need to have enough time to see the horizon...to spend time with the sun and sand and the blue ocean around..and to watch the stars peacefully at night... am so bored with my life...its not that money and career don't matter anymore...but the thing is ...where's life? i used to just simply live life the way i want it should be ...near life itself...get to have problems...yes, but still feel that i am alive not just a mere walking zombie forced to do things...it is much more better to be just a slave....one have a choice to get out and walk away....point is....i wanna just simply live beside the beach and have time again to appreciate the beauty it offers...also if it's not too much of an asking ...also have someone beside me to watch the stars above at night....what i have right now is not what i can say i despise though...i got friends around me...my family..my son. i get to go out, go crazy, booze up all night but then after all of those craziness? what? nothin. one realizes the dilemma of getting old when one's near it...speacially if one doesnt have a better half ...blah blah blah again! i hate life ..the one that i have right now..not because am single and stuff like that it's just that i am not at the place where i want to be...i love the people i am with right now...but then... i just can where i wanna be...the beach...where the sand is gleaming white, the water sparkling blue and the sun is scorching hot but the wind is whistling a fine lullaby....haaaaaaaaaay....






....i just hope that you'll be my man....

Thursday, October 28, 2004

i didnt mean to

o yes....some of my friends think you're cute clean looking and stuff like. ako? i dont...noon... kasi my impression of you is like bully ka or something... but now i seem to like you...nagiging close na tayo... you even would hug me. even though we dont get to see each other that much. i know i know here i go again.. no this is not the samething though as what i felt before for someone...but alteast i know now that i am moving on...yah i still do have feelings for that other guy but blah...forget it... i like you... specially when you smile... you dont look arrogant to me nmore...i feel like you're starting to notice me..or it is just that youre just starting to make friends with me? ...basta what i know is that i like you now! and i think this will start to grow....



bitches will forever be bitches..can be bitchier though

Sunday, October 03, 2004

fucked up and bored!

i just cant believe it...am starting to get so bored on my work now....and i kinda miss this guy...haaaaaaaaay